“Beloved, let us love another, for love is of God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. He who does not love does not know God, for God is love” (I John 4:7)
Who can dispute these glorious words and the message of mutual love, which is the hallmark of Christianity? How many poems and songs have this precious entreaty at its base? Can it be possible that any rational person might confuse or misunderstand its sacred meaning? And yet the great theologian, St. Maximus the Confessor, in writing about love, analyzes the motives for loving one another. He provides five categories. Some of them are worthy of praise, but some are not. Indeed, they turn that precious gift into selfishness.
He puts in first rank persons who are filled with the grace of goodness. They are replete with virtue, and they love everybody for the sake of the Lord Almighty. There are such people especially among the Orthodox Christians, thank heaven, and we are so fortunate to be alive in the time when they share our world with us. We humans are social creatures. We are ever on the hunt for role models, beginning with our parents and continuing as we age. In a culture fixated on entertainment and athletics, many grab onto what the media sanction as celebrities, but the Church is where we must be able to find role models of chastity, humility, selflessness and piety. Otherwise, it would be better to go inward and not look oneself for an ideal.
Next are those who may not be as virtuous themselves, but they have the good sense and discernment to recognize purity of heart when they are near it. They love the perfectly good and moral human pearls, and they do their best to emulate their flawlessness. Sts. Andrew and John are obvious types who fit this description, leaving their fishing nets to go in search of God in the person of St. John the Baptist, and then in our Lord, God and Savior Jesus Christ.
These two personality types according to St. Maximus (The Four Hundred Chapters on Love, Second Century 9) form the first category, those who are worthy of praise and emulation.
Next are the natural reasons for loving others. Parents love their children, and the children in turn love their parents. In our times, however, we must add that this is how it ought to be but doesn’t happen in all cases. The parent/child love is normal. As such, it’s not worth special accolades. It ought to be instinctive for parents. All creatures do this naturally—protecting, serving, feeding and even dying for their offspring. Yet what is natural to most cultures is abnormal in today’s western society. Europeans are complaining about a drastic drop in population due to the reluctance of many married couples to have children. They resent the time, bother and expense that impinges on their life styles. In America the same champions of abortion on demand now after four decades of abortions whine over the loss of a generation of workers who normally would make the Social Security system functional.
The last category includes vanity. We like those who enhance our personalities. They flatter us, they defer to us, and we enjoy the attention. It takes into account the greed of so many who pander to the wealthy for whatever they feel they will benefit from the pseudo-affection. The lowest of all forms of love, which is what the culture we live in understands by the term are those who satisfy their sexual urges, obsessed with sex and food, not rising far above the region of their private parts. The selfless love of God, agape, is the ideal for true Christians.