Through the Tears

“She turned around and saw Jesus standing there, and did not know that it was Jesus. Jesus said to her, ‘Woman, why are you weeping? Whom are you seeking?’ She supposed Him to be the gardener and said to Him, ‘Sir, if you have carried Him away, tell me where
you have laid Him, and I will take Him away.’” (John 20:14)

How long was He standing there? How long do you wait for a woman to go on weeping? It’s not an easy question to answer. Crying is therapeutic. As the fathers say, tears wash the windows of the soul. But they were talking about weeping for one’s sins. This was not the case. It’s odd about life. When we are born, we cry because we were slapped. Then we cry when we are hungry or need tending. Later, we cry when we are angry, frustrated, or because we have learned to control parents with our tears. Then when somebody special enters our life and takes hold of our heart, we feel we cannot do without him, and so we even pray that he will always remain. Bitter tears come when that doesn’t happen.

So it was with Mary Magdalene. She felt abandoned and alone, angry at Jesus’ murderers, frustrated at having been helpless to save Him. Yet none of that was true. She wasn’t abandoned, and she wasn’t alone. She must have known that He told the apostles: “A little while, and you will not see Me; and again a little while, and you will see Me;” and “because I go to the Father” (John 16:17). The little while had not quite passed, yet there He was the whole while she was weeping.

Not only priests but all persons have been in a similar situation, where somebody is crying and we are standing by helplessly and passively, because our presence is ignored. The weeper goes on ignoring not just us, but the Christ who comes to salve the suffering through us. The one who had been baptized into Christ and had put on Christ is capable of reminding the one who feels forsaken that she is not alone. We make a difference because He does.

Jesus Christ never comes alone. He brings the ideal Comforter from the Father, the Holy Spirit. That’s why He told the apostles that He had to leave them for awhile. Mary Magdalene finally recognized the Lord, because He had become a man, but the Holy Spirit can never be seen; nevertheless, He is “everywhere present and fills all things” as we confirm by the prayer to Him. People of our secular society do not know that the Holy Spirit is with us, around us and in us, but we are sure of that—which is why the answer to the question “Why are you weeping?” has no really good answer. At least not for a believing Christian. If we say we are crying because we had lost somebody, then that person is with Christ. If we say that we are alone, it’s because we cannot see Christ for our tears. If we feel abandoned, we have decided to feel that way only because we chose to ignore what we know in our hearts—God is everywhere. As the Psalm says:

“Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence?

If I ascend into heaven You are there; If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there—.

If I say, ‘Surely the darkness shall fall on me,’ even the night shall be a light to me”.

(Psalm 139:7,11)

Our Lord, God and Savior Jesus Christ had to endure the trial of the Cross alone, but in all other times and situations He is with the Father and the Holy Spirit. And so it was in the garden, when He encountered the woman who loved Him more than life itself. So He left her without satisfying her desires: “Don’t hold onto Me,” He said to her, because He had not yet ascended to His Father, but rather she should hold onto the faith she had in Him even when she didn’t understand Him or His words, which was much of the time.

Mary Magdalene is a paradigm of faith, hope, and most of all love, giving us a prime example for our own lives at the times we feel abandoned, forsaken and alone.