Session 6: But We Love Each Other!

By the end of this session participants should be able to . . .

  • discuss why God created sex and sexuality
  • define and discuss Christian “chastity” as using our sexuality as God intended not just for self-satisfaction.
  • list some of the differences between loving someone and lusting after someone
  • explain why two people mutually consenting to have sex outside of marriage is still sinful

Useful Texts

  • Genesis 1:26-31
  • Song of Songs 1:2-4; 7:6-12
  • Mark 10:1-11
  • 1 Cor 7:3-5, 13:4-8a
  • Hebrews 13:4

Introduction

Hand out 4X6 index cards. Have participants write down one or two words that describe how they feel about sex.” - give examples of “feeling” words (scared, excited, confused, anxious, nervous, confident, etc.). Tell participants that this is anonymous and that they shouldn’t compare their cards. Have participants give you their cards. Say, “Everyone has different feelings when we talk about sex.” Mix the cards up and read them, making sure not to give away who wrote what. Say, “Hopefully, today we can talk about why God gave us sexuality and get some ideas to help us deal with our feelings.”

Break participants into groups of 3 or 4 (same sex). Hand out entertainment magazines (Premiere, TV Guide, etc.), video flyers, song lyrics, and other pop culture items, along with a piece of poster board, scissors, glue sticks, markers, and construction paper. You may wish to tell participants at the end of the last session to bring in song lyrics, etc. that they hear speaking about sex.

Say, “We hear a lot about sex and see it everywhere. Most of us know that the way society represents and talks about sex is different than the way God and His Church teach about sex. Pretend that aliens from Mars have come to earth to learn about us and our culture. On one of the poster boards create a visual presentation that represents our society’s views on sex.

When they have finished have participants explain their display. Next, ask participants in what ways society’s views on sex can be harmful to people. List all responses on a large piece of newsprint with the word “Warning” at the top.

Biblical Exploration

Cut out a large circle using a large piece of poster board. Cut the circle into 5 puzzle pieces and write one of the scripture citations above on each peace. Give participants each a piece, have them look up the citation on it and write down what the citation says about God’s plan for sexuality using their own words. [Genesis 1:26-31 - God created sexuality; Song of Songs 1:2-4, 7:6-12 - sexual love should be beautiful and enjoyable; Mark 10:1-11 - God designed marriage;

1 Cor 7:3-5, 13:4-8a - sex is for the pleasure and benefit of both people in marriage; Hebrews 13:4 - Sex belongs in marriage.]

Have participants put the puzzle together. Ask, “Thinking about God’s plan for sex and society’s plan, which seems healthier? [God’s] Why? [God treats sex as a very important and powerful part of us, that can make us especially close to the one we love or can put up barriers that make it difficult to get truly close to anyone.]

Love vs. Lust Worksheet

Copy and handout the Love vs. Lust worksheet. Read through the sheet together giving examples where you can. Ask and discuss the following questions:

  • Do the two ever get confused?
  • What are some situations when we may think we are in love but are really lusting after someone?
  • Even when two people mutually consent to have sex outside of marriage why do you think the Church considers it still sinful? [Because each is not loving each other, but treating them only as a way to get enjoyment. There is no true giving without marriage, only taking.]

Journal Reflection

We’ve talked a lot about sex and sexuality from many points of view. We all now know what God wants us to do, but, as with everything in our lives, He has given us the possibility to choose wether or not we want to follow it. Thinking about everything we have talked about, write a letter to God and yourself describing what role you want sex to have in your life?

Remember, even if you have followed society’s views on sex before now, you can choose God’s path now. By repenting, going to confession and receiving absolution, God can and wants to forgive you and help you follow Him.

Session Conclusion

God created sex for us to become close to the person we love in a completely unique way from all our other relationships. Sex always creates a bond that can only be understood between a husband and a wife. While our society tells us differently, sex outside of marriage not only can harm us physically, it will definitely wound us emotionally and spiritually.